Mystic Banana

"I'm glad you all could make it" says Jaison with a smile on his face as the group sits cluster fucked like some car full of clowns. "Why are here?" asks Noel sandwiched between Brad the Truck Driver and Trisha the bar wench. "It's been years since we've spoken. I thought you might still be mad about the whole me sleeping with your best friend" she says with a smile. Brad undresses her with his eyes. He always did have a fondness for making Jaison feel inferior as a man. She looked back with a quick glance of possible interest. She always did have a fondness for sleeping with the friends of men she felt were below her. However, Jaison didn't flinch at their attempt at twisting the dagger a little deeper into his heart. Teresa always did have a fondness for making Jaison feel inferior as a man. She looked back with a quick glance of possible interest. She always did have a fondness for sleeping with the friends of men she felt were below ...

Technology has grown so rapidly that we'll soon be able to craft nano bots using sub- atomic robots. T.V.'s are getting so small that they can now be installed into goggle's. So, keep your eyes out for the full virtual internet experience with the Ocular Chrome Google's. Oculus' newest versions will change they way we look at life for the next 6 months to year 1/ 2. Then, we'll come out with holographic kites. But until then, we can expect to get sucked into virtual worlds like never before with the Oculus Rift. Now, a firm competitor with reality. I also heard that Pokemon Go caused many lost souls to wonder the real world in search of imaginary creatures built in a Japanese Laboratory deep Mt. Fugi with the help of Gia and other Gods from Asian folklore. And why does this muse me?

Theses are certainly crazy times we live in. When someone says that Ancient Giant Man Eating Reptillian's being summoned out of the interdimensional portals created by the super collider. I go yeah, sounds about right. Things gotten so crazy, even Satan's scared of the Illuminati. They keep summoning him to sign their Vatican contracts to start building temples in 33 key locations across his infernal kingdom. Not to mention exhausted because they keep spilling his GMO ridden seed across the Earth, seducing him with Chris Angels and promises of more genocide; while trying to get him drunk enough to persuade him to have sex with one of the Royal families salmon they captured and brought into sex slavery. And we need to be conCERNed, because as we speak, the people running the Super Collider are summoning Shiva to do the dance of death so they can send Mormons through portals to spread the word of Freemason and black magician Joseph Smith to hell's high generals. And no...

Did I ever tell you that my grandmother's been deathly afraid of water since she was a little girl? Her aunt once told her that a psychic predicted someone in the family would die from drowning. It reminds me of the time I almost drowned. I was swimming with some friends at the nearby lake when I started cramping up. I was so out of shape that I ended up coughing up water when we got to land. I thought about that psychic's prediction that day. The ocean terrifies me. The idea of swimming in the chaotic waters with its animal attacks or strong tides isn't for everyone. People wonder out in the ocean and never come back. Ever seen the movie, The Perfect Storm? One moment, the oceans calm and bountiful. Then the storm of the century hits and George Clooney's swept under the sea by a huge rogue wave.Did you know the ocean floor has methane gas pockets that can cause a ship to sink to the bottom like pebbles? Did you know the ocean floor has methane gas pockets that can...

My daughter is having problems with her spelling. Her teacher suggests signing her up for Witchcraft. 

 I've always been an innovative spirit. In school, we had to invent something for our school project. I innovated by adding Oreos to Ice Cream. But the genius never really went away until recently.  I remember mixing juice into my applesauce before that was even marketable. Two years later, it was on the market. My family thought I was weird. But I know what it was. It was innovation. Maybe not Tesla big. Trivial in comparison. Embarrassing really. Pointless to be honest. However, I remember another time I was waiting for a friend to pick me up during Middle School for the local Yugioh card tournament. It was late in the dead of winter and I was standing outside the front entrance, a gated community, well more like a Trailer Park in the middle of the Wisconsin Boonies, and I was standing there freezing, and the only thing I could do to keep myself entertained was chant a rhyme to my friend. It went like this. "I'm going to kill Bill, Bill. I'm going to kill Bi...

Me and my friends tried playing charades using an old crystal ball, it wasn't very fun, we spent the whole night losing to the future.

Now, back when the torrent site Demonoid was still around, I had no clue what the hell the occult was; but after I came across a Thirty Three Giga Bites collection of Occult Books- I downloaded it onto my external hard drive- and put it in the corner to collect dust. I was afraid of what I would find inside: "Would a demon pop out the moment I open the document? Would I raise the spirit of Jeffery Dhamer from the pits of the abyss after an unsuccessful summoning of Shaggy from Scooby Doo? Would I start wearing black nail polish and refer to myself as Magus Sexmi Eternius?" I feared for my eternal soul. But mainstream religion wasn't doing it. What did I really have to lose? My family upbringing of good old fashioned Christianity and fear of everything else had left me hollow and empty. I sought that Occult collection for an alternative heaven. What I found was a smorgasbord of knowledge that leaves me both satisfied, and hungry for more. I've found more posit...

I tried playing solitaire with a pack of tarot cards but found it hard to predict. You're never quite sure if your cards are telling you have solitaire or Lou Gherigs Disease. Once I laid a High Priestess before bed but woke up next to a queen. I'm not sure what that means in Tarot maybe some life changes are coming my way, but in solitaire, that's a clear sign you have a drinking problem.